I ended a 16-year-old friendship with a dead weight. I’ve been giving this person the same tired advice since we were 19. 19-years-old! She hasn’t lifted a finger to change the trajectory of her life since we were 19. 19!

At some point, you need to stop making excuses for people, stop picking up the trail of mess they leave behind them. You need to realize that you’ve grown apart, and they’re dragging you down. And they always will until you cut them loose.

To her face, Mani’s playing the “good guy” and distancing himself from it all. I get that. I support that. His band is important to him. I feel less guilty about the whole thing knowing that their band remains intact.

It says a lot that the only two bridesmaids on her side both dropped out of the wedding within a week of each other. It was a coldhearted thing for me to do a month before the wedding, but nobody disrespects me.

Tomorrow marks my 32nd year on this lovely little planet. There’s no better time to trim the fat.


You are growing up and growing ” balls” ! . It takes a lot to cut a friend out like that. I had to do the same. She was my BFF since 5 th grade and was having an affair with my husband. Btw I named my new cat BYE FELECIA!!!!




the Ravens and the NFL didn’t cut and suspend Ray Rice indefinitely for beating his fiancée. they did it because you, the public, saw that video

John Harbaugh, Raven’s head coach said in his press conference today that “the video changed things”. because it wasn’t enough for us…

So true it’s all about money!


The NFL cares more about illegal dugs and animal abuse than the abuse against women


Ray Rice got a 2-game suspension for knocking his then-fiancee Janay out cold and uncaringly standing over her motionless body before dragging her out of the elevator. He later on gets suspended only after the video surfaces online. How many years did Michael Vick get for dog fighting?…

The NFL acts like having players rock pink for the whole month of October means they really care about women. Nah them mofos just like rocking pink and clearing names. 

Why is he not in jail?



Ray Rice has been let go by the Ravens. It should have happened the moment after the incident, but *deep sigh* that’s not what happens in sports, right? I don’t give a shit what happens to Ray Rice’s “career.”

But the biggest concern I have is for Janay Rice and her safety. I mean, her husband…

I wonder how bad things will be for her now.


We begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be. The only problem is that there is also so much other stuff, typically fixations with how people perceive us, how to get more of the things that we think will make us happy, and with keeping our weight down. So the real issue is how do we gently stop being who we aren’t? How do we relieve ourselves of the false fronts of people-pleasing and affectation, the obsessive need for power and security, the backpack of old pain, and the psychic Spanx that keeps us smaller and contained?

Here’s how I became myself: mess, failure, mistakes, disappointments, and extensive reading; limbo, indecision, setbacks, addiction, public embarrassment, and endless conversations with my best women friends; the loss of people without whom I could not live, the loss of pets that left me reeling, dizzying betrayals but much greater loyalty, and overall, choosing as my motto William Blake’s line that we are here to learn to endure the beams of love.